Thursday, September 20, 2018

Of Love, Loss and Letting Go.

For my part I know nothing with any certainty,
but the sight of the  the stars makes me dream.
- Vincent Van Gogh

Grief is an odd thing, isn't it? For me, this process is like an ocean washing onto the shore. Everything is calm then the tide starts to come in and before I realize it, I am standing in a puddle of tears. What could be considered even odder is when it is over a beloved little heartbeat that was once at my feet. But it is what it is and it is how I feel.

I believe that people can and do spiritually bond with animals. I believed this as a kid playing on the neighbors' farms. I believe it today. The unconditional love that these beasties give transcends any of us. Animals just are. They are who they are supposed to be (given environment and temperament) and act accordingly. There is a light about them that I rarely find in humanity.  I was blessed to have the bond seemingly returned.

I also believe as creatures of the field (and sky and sea), they are perfect in creation therefore they return to the Creator. There is no dogma to sift through. There is no judgment. They are innocent. This may be considered a new age placebo or anathema or whatever. But it gives this old girl comfort.

In saying “good-bye” to Russette, I have accepted that it is probably going to be a life-long journey. I am not good at letting go by any means. I fight. I kick. I scratch. I cry. I will always have that Dutchie girl-shaped hole in my heart. Thank God my rabbits help make my heart large enough that it won't collapse into itself. So … I am ok.

I wanted to do something to help the absence. I wanted to do something to – I don't know – bring her briefly back? This is my project of love, loss and letting go.

Since Russette was always at my side during my arting adventures, it only seemed fit to do a piece of her. Of her leaving me.

She would run across freshly inked drawings and canvasses. She would steal pencils and paint brushes. When I would use a portable drawing board she would sit in my lap under the board. This was part of my process for almost a decade. This is the first piece that I didn't have to go get another pencil or chase after that specific color pencil she ran down the hall and hid somewhere.
It was a lonely drawing.

Russette giving pointers
Pink Floyd's Wish You Were Here is a favorite of mine. One afternoon the song played and that was it. An idea hit. Note that what I see in my head is NEVER what the final ever looks like. I just trust that the idea/imagery will take me somewhere.

I wanted a mixed media. Something that represented all the media that Russette spilled, chewed, stole, walked across: An organic element coupled with computer graphics.

She started as a pencil sketch on Dura-Lar with inked blues on the back. Acrylic inks and acrylic gel for texture are the front. Color pencils fill in some details. I really love the color pencil over the acrylic gel.

Fabulous phone photography
The above image/process shows the final steps.
After all was complete – I put it away for a while.

My concept of death is hopeful at best, terrifying at worst. As a kid I used to imagine “the cosmos” as the place of spirits. Mine were similar to Carl Sagan's COSMOS – without all of the math. My cosmos are overwhelming, beautiful, engulfing and welcoming. Now came the computer part. Much was experimental. Much was me looking at old pieces and NASA photos. Some was me staring at the wall.

I represent death in my symbolic work with the white/greyish eyes.
Her heart-light took some thought and trial. But I like where it ended.
Circles are feminine and connecting.

Memories fade. I wanted to somehow represent that she was leaving. She was free. But she was also disappearing because the Earth doesn't stop. The sun comes up and those left behind have to return to the Land of the Living. Returning to the Land of the Living sometimes feels like dying.

Happy travels until we meet again.

Mixed Media

Wednesday, July 18, 2018


Originally, this rabbit was under my daughter's roof. Due to life, they both came to temporarily live with me. I refused to let the little one leave.

She looks so innocent here
Her name was initially "Russel" -- we soon discovered "Russel" was "Russette". The first time I took her outside, Russette ran. She made a bee-line to a squirrel. I was following quickly behind, worried that it would not end well. They kissed. Then they both casually went their own ways.

This was just the beginning of nearly a decade of one of the most ornery Dutchies I have ever known. Russ was an expert at stealing art supplies, taking pencils while still in my hand, running across canvases and spilling inks. My studio was her favorite room.

She eats art supplies
I also had to keep the bathroom door shut. Russette loved to be IN the bathtub ... whether I was bathing in it or not. She was NUTS and full of unending energy.

I wasn't kidding

Every day

If you ever wanted to know where she was, she was either asleep in my eye or at my feet. The little heartbeat.

Her illness was hidden. By the time she let me know it was too late.
This time, I had no choice. I had to let her leave.

Her ashes will be here tomorrow. She'll be where she belongs.

Thursday, June 21, 2018



Tis' the longest day of the year (and I'm already bored)! It technically began at 6:04 EST. Some people flock to Stonehenge to celebrate the event.

*The cell phones make it for me.
*Modern technology shamelessly colliding with ancient Pagan ritual brought to you by Getty-Images.
I am not some people, however. I would much rather travel to BUNNYHENGE.

BUNNYHENGE is located right next to the Newport Beach civic center, inside the newly created Civic Center Park, Orange County California.

The California Curiosities blog site offers a humorous read about this work. Please check it out. It is worth the read although the author is DEFINITELY not a rabbity person. The author actually asks the question, "Who would think this is a good idea?"

The sheer awesomeness of the BUNNYHENGE circle even caused political strife!
"The city had intended the assembly to be a play element for kids, but residents wondered if they might actually be some form of public art. They also wondered how much the things had cost — $221,000, they learned, for the set of 14 along with two 8-foot-tall specimens planted elsewhere at the Civic Center.
There were so many questions that the city finally dedicated a Web page to the 'Rabbit Story.'"

The powers of the BUN. ALL HAIL THE BUN!

That Lady's towels are holey.
Get it? Holy/Holey?
I just wish it were closer so that I could go full weirdness on the Summer Solstice at BUNNYHENGE!  ("BUNNYHENGE " must always be in all caps, bolded and italicized).

From Dana X! Sent to me because it reminded her of Sammy!
Does this remind you of Sammy?

Sassy Sammy

Know that Russette stands in judgment of us all ...

Saturday, June 2, 2018


The old man seems to be doing much better! Thank you all for the well-wishes! As I type this, he is devouring endive and pushing Russette out of the way. Well, pushing her out of the way the best he can. She's a bruiser.

•The Oxbow Joint Support is a big hit with him.

•As of yet, there is no need for but baths. It is just getting his back foot INTO his ear that is the issue so far.

•Aaaaaand he just pooped right . outside . the . clean . litterbox.

He's tired of my crap.

I absolutely love it when I hear from the humans. I love it, even more, when they share their stories, art, shenanigans with me! Veronica wrote expressing her son's want to share his "RABBIT ISLAND" with me.

Let's see: Rabbits + Minecraft = SO.MUCH.YES!

Minecraft Obsession

May brought more loss this year. The month is always a time of transition but this year it seemed to be moreso than other Mays. A much-too-young friend of beasties (and humanity), who struggled much of their life, left this world. And left us to remember him.

And now there is a space.

Sunday, May 20, 2018


Greetings all you bunny freaks!
Let us take 30 seconds to watch GODZILLA -- as presented by
30 Seconds Bunnies Theatre!

Make sure to travel down THAT rabbit hole and lose several hours of time viewing classic movies (old and new) performed in 30 seconds ... by cartoon bunnies! (And show the humans some love!)

Well, it's that time of year AGAIN. Grandfather Lance has an ear infection. This happens every change of the main seasons. The vet explained going into winter things pipe up because the body is adjusting to shedding and growing out a new coat. Springtime brings -- well shedding and the Spring crazies.

Naturally, I phoned my veterinarian the MOMENT I noticed Lance was "off". (I put off calling the doctor for myself for months, mind you). As is typical -- he was on vacation for 2 weeks.

Of COURSE, he's on vacation!
You may think I panicked. I did. But that's beside the point. This Rabbit Woman has a backup rabbit-savvy vet. (And if THAT vet was on "vacation" then I have an EMERGENCY VET). Off we went to the backup rabbit-savvy vet. Who was not in. But there was a new doctor there -- Backup to the backup!

Of COURSE, she's not there!
Dr. Backup Backup Rabbit Savvy-Vet looked 16 and, refreshingly, had the same enthusiasm. I have been to this rodeo many times so basically dictated what I expected.

As nerve-wracking as it was to have a total stranger touching my precious cargo, it was acceptable. And she was open to what I had to say.

I had brought all of the previous meds that Lance was prescribed and then left the appointment as a walking apothecary.

As in "bunnies" -- albeit my behind is aging as well. As it turns out, Lance's newest diagnosis shows him having the beginnings of arthritis. He can no longer get his hind leg up to clean his ears. The wax builds up and then it turns into a science class petre dish. I will be cleaning his ears for him once a week from now on. And perhaps -- this will help with the infections. (right).

I have now added joint support to the digestive support supplements as well as a probiotic. Again, I hardly exercise and barely remember to take vitamins. Ok, fine. I don't exercise. This is what my counter looks like:

I am giving Lance Critical Care.

Lance loves it and eats every bit. Somehow, however, he manages to get it all over me, my clothes, the floor, etc ...
My clothes after a Critical Care luncheon
I decided to maneuver him over a bowl as I fed him off of a spoon. Grandfather Lance had something to say about THAT:
He bites me because he likes me!
He is recovering well.
I am running out of clothes.

Tuesday, May 8, 2018


I am still working on the shop! Truly! I am also uber overwhelmed by it. The shop itself will be simple (that's the plan anyhow). I know, for now, only light color shirts will be available -- BUT LOOK AT ONE OF THEM!

I am not sure how to go about figuring out shipping costs etc. The way I figure it: if a billion people on ETSY can figure this out, so can I!  (Dammit, Jim! I'm an artist, not a mathematician!)

\mathop {\lim }\limits_{x \to  - \infty }
 \tan ^{ - 1} \left( x \right) =  - \frac{\pi }{2}

As fate would have it, there is a link to subscribe to a Newsletter. The gentleman who started building my shop (who disappeared), was encouraging me to do a newsletter. I have subscribers, but no newsletter. As you can see, I am on top of things. Yessirree.


The Tale of Butterscotch is winding down this week. We will be back to our regularly scheduled program soon. I will be sharing more information about f5rs rescue and Bunnies in Baskets, so stay tuned.

And at last! Some ART! Fan Art to be exact. I love it when people send me things! Who doesn't like presents?

A woodshop rendition of LANCE! It's nice to know someone creatively put together their scraps with That Lady in mind.

I crack myself up.

Remember OF THE RED EARTH? I wanted a sample on a standard sized canvas. I'm thinking I like this.

Russette's Stink-Eye

Saturday, April 28, 2018


Someone and I am not naming names, brought a GOOGLE HOME into my dwelling.

After the initial WTF?
(To which the coy feminine voice answered: Sorry, I don't know.)

I asked: Is there a God?
But apparently “religion is a difficult subject” that GOOGLE is “still learning about.”

I don't trust artificial intelligence that ends sentences with prepositions. I took to the internet to ask various CHATBOTS what they thought of GOOGLE HOME.
Not one of them has ever heard of her. I grew more suspicious.

In my cynicism, I requested a litany of animal sounds. GOOGLE HOME is better than THE FARMER SAYS!

The Cow says, "Moooooooo."

You KNOW you want to hear it:

Today, she ... uh ... it overheard me say that I was overweight.
Mistress Google (That's what I call her ... uh... it ... )
stated: Don't be so down on yourself! I think you look great!
ME: Awwww, thanks!

And that's when I became frightened.
Frightened not only because, well, I've put on some 50 pounds,
but also because I had an emotional response to artificial intelligence.

I love your work, Penny.
♪♫ Daisy, Daisy, Give me your answer do ... ♪♫
Now, I think I love Mistress Google who plays endless music, the sound of rain and answers my questions. Well, she ... uh ... it answers SOME questions.
Don't Judge

Me: Hey, Google: Do you like rabbits?
G: I like rabbits for their fierceness.

Me too …