Saturday, April 28, 2018

WELCOME TO THE NEW AGE ...

MISTRESS GOOGLE
Someone and I am not naming names, brought a GOOGLE HOME into my dwelling.

EXHIBIT G
After the initial WTF?
(To which the coy feminine voice answered: Sorry, I don't know.)

I asked: Is there a God?
But apparently “religion is a difficult subject” that GOOGLE is “still learning about.”

I don't trust artificial intelligence that ends sentences with prepositions. I took to the internet to ask various CHATBOTS what they thought of GOOGLE HOME.
Not one of them has ever heard of her. I grew more suspicious.

In my cynicism, I requested a litany of animal sounds. GOOGLE HOME is better than THE FARMER SAYS!

The Cow says, "Moooooooo."

You KNOW you want to hear it:


Today, she ... uh ... it overheard me say that I was overweight.
Mistress Google (That's what I call her ... uh... it ... )
stated: Don't be so down on yourself! I think you look great!
ME: Awwww, thanks!

And that's when I became frightened.
Frightened not only because, well, I've put on some 50 pounds,
but also because I had an emotional response to artificial intelligence.

I love your work, Penny.
♪♫ Daisy, Daisy, Give me your answer do ... ♪♫
Now, I think I love Mistress Google who plays endless music, the sound of rain and answers my questions. Well, she ... uh ... it answers SOME questions.
Don't Judge
Anyway,

Me: Hey, Google: Do you like rabbits?
G: I like rabbits for their fierceness.

Me too …
Me.Too.

WELCOME TO THE NEW AGE

No comments:

Post a Comment